Those pesky Fat Pants are always up to something! Anything they can do to get a rise out of me, they’ll do. No wonder they have been playing it so cool about my weight loss. They have been tricking me all along. I haven’t been losing any weight… it’s all just being transferred to my boobs! Why else would they be getting bigger while my waist, stomach, and thighs get smaller? I mean… I have been going crazy trying to figure out why my bras are suddenly shrinking and my XXL shirts are fitting like Mediums.
This is not the first time this cruel joke has been played on me. I was not able to breast feed either of my children. Imagine my surprise when these boobs grew to astronomical sizes both times and both times were totally empty! Let’s face it… the “girls” are being bankrolled by the Fat Pants! Traitors! They are the the first I gain it and the last place I loose it.
If any other Fat Pants slayers out there have a suggestion on how I can deflate these balloons without going under the knife again (yes…a story for another time), I would love to hear it!